4
The next day when I returned home, I found Lucas waiting at my door.
Seeing me approach, he walked towards me urgently.
“Olivia, why did you move without telling me?”
“Do you know how long I’ve been looking for you?”
“I’ve been so worried about you. I haven’t been able to contact you for 24 hours.”
“Can’t you be more considerate? Don’t make me worry like this!”
“I only love you. It’s not what you think between Chloe and me.”
“Why don’t you believe me?”
“I’ve always seen her as just a friend.”
He was very emotional.
I spoke up at the right moment: “I don’t love you anymore, Lucas.”
He looked at me, his eyes filled with expected sadness.
“Can we start over? We can have another child.”
Helplessness, extreme helplessness.
“Lucas, the woman you truly love isn’t me, it’s Chloe. You can’t let go of me now because you’ve lost your memory. Your memories are stuck at the point when you loved me most. Once your memory returns, you won’t be like this anymore.”
He seemed to have received a huge shock, his pain so extreme that he became expressionless.
After a long while, he spoke in a hoarse voice,
“Olivia, I do love you! Why have we ended up like this?”
Yes, indeed.
How did time change us into what we are now?
It’s as if on the road of time, we met at a fork, walked hand in hand for a while, and then
went our separate ways.
This accident only made our paths cross briefly, but those superficial injuries can never
be healed.
My heart had aged beyond its years, no longer capable of stirring.
Moreover, Lucas wouldn’t remain without his memories forever.
He says he loves me because he’s forgotten these three years.
What if he remembers?
Where would I go then?
I shook my head.
Let flowers be flowers, let trees be trees. Give others back to themselves, and give myself back to myself.
Look forward to flowers blooming, look forward to becoming a better version of myself!
That’s all.
Lucas didn’t leave that night. He stubbornly insisted on staying to take care of me.
He said I had just had an abortion and needed care.
I didn’t stop him.
Let him be.
Anyway, the outcome was already set.
Nothing could change it now.
There wasn’t actually a bed for him to sleep in here.
He probably knew he wasn’t welcome.
So he volunteered to sleep in the living room.
When I got up for water at night, I saw him watching a projection in the living room.
He hadn’t turned on the lights and had muted the sound.
The images were flickering, projected onto his face.
He looked focused and serious.
I moved closer.
He was watching our wedding video.
The projection was large, showing the moment we exchanged vows.
I had jokingly whispered in his ear that if he ever betrayed me, I’d castrate him.
He had laughed heartily.
Then he solemnly promised that he would love only me forever.
Otherwise, he’d never have children.
Thinking about it now, it was like a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Except his childlessness came through me.
Our child was gone.
He closed his eyes painfully, hugging his head tightly.
“How did it come to this?”
“I loved you so much!”
“How did we end up like this?”
“Our child is gone.”
“You all say I fell in love with Chloe.”
“What exactly did I do in these three years?”
I didn’t know if he was asking me or himself.
I just stood by and watched.
I could only look on coldly at his pain.
The beautiful memories we once shared had been worn away to nothing over these three
years.
